Gratitude For Sale
We will all hit lows. All of us. Every single one of us, at some point, for some reason, known or unknown, will hit a low.
How will you show up for them when they do?
How will you show compassion? How will you let them melt in front of you? Will you stand steady or will you fear the emotion and run?
How will you hold someone when you know they are alone, hurting, wishing they had someone to care for them, someone to hold their heart even if just for a few moments?
Will you say "let me know if you need anything" and then check it off your list? Or will you show up, be there and listen?
Can you allow yourself to truly understand that some life events, some experiences, don't get better as fast as we want to believe they do, but rather they unfold layer by layer, oftentimes each new layer revealing more pain and hurt. Can you look at someone who you know has been through a lot and simply acknowledge that they got out of bed that day, and for them that might be a feat?
Can you accept that someone may need you on a day that's hard for you? That you can still love yourself and help someone else in need?
It's not all about guarding our energy or taking care of ourselves. It's about so much more, and it's about loving ourselves enough to know that we can be generous and we can show up for others and that we will not lose anything.
Self help and Instagram and all these venues we get to post our yoga photos and smoothie recipes that leave out the darkness of life and the reality so many people live in day in and day out doesn't help. It may give a momentary high to those reading, it may make people feel like they are a part of the cool crowd, the influencers, the ones in-the-know, but you know what? it's unhealthy, and It perpetuates a lifestyle that is rarely attainable, and that in the end probably causes more anxiety and sadness for people than it helps.
It's gratitude for sale and self absorption disguised as self love.
We are complex and yet we want simplicity and quickness in the way we help ourselves and in the way we hold each other. But only when we open ourselves to the very nature of what being human is, are we truly alive. I believe that no matter what we are facing in our own lives there is a piece of our heart that can be reserved for loving others, that we are able to both care for ourselves while showing up for others. I believe that we need each other, we do, and that we gain so much even in the worst of times by allowing ourselves to extend love to others who need it.
We can never truly understand the oceans of sadness and fear and pain that someone may carry in them, but we can respect them for it, we can respect them for everything they've lived and carried.
Helping other people isn't about us. It's not an ego trip, and it must be done with an open heart. It's not a way to feel important or to hear ourselves spout wisdom because then we get to show everyone "the way". We don't know the way for anyone else, in fact we don't even know what others are truly experiencing unless we sit with them and hear them and learn who they are and how they got there.